bears! bears! bears!: i am hand drawn.

bearsbearsbears

[dewplayer:http://www.fileden.com/files/2009/1/1/2248587/Bears%21%20Bears%21%20Bears%21%20-%20I%20Am%20Hand%20Drawn.mp3]

dl: Bears! Bears! Bears! – I Am Hand Drawn (alt)

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Bears! Bears! Bears! sounds like a really cute band, right? Well, they’re not. I mean, they might be physically attractive. I don’t really remember. But their sound definitely isn’t very cute.

They kind of remind me of all the bands I used to listen to when I was eighteen who I don’t like to admit I still indulge in. Except I don’t think I would have liked them when I was eighteen.

There’s something really gritty about the vocals, maybe evoking a little bit of an early Modest Mouse vibe. Actually, it’s more like the lead singer is drunk, trying to sound drunk, not fully opening his mouth or opening his mouth too much. And I like it?

I’m weirdly hypnotized by the line, “You are all sexually attractive to me.” I have no idea what it means in the context of the song because I’m too lazy to actually decipher all of the lyrics. I like that it sometimes sounds like, “You are all sexually attracted to me.” Or maybe I just pretend that it sounds like that because I’m projecting my own narcissism.

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[dewplayer:http://www.fileden.com/files/2009/1/1/2248587/01%20I%20Guess%20We%20Are%20Both%20Lonely.mp3]

boner track: Bears! Bears! Bears! – I Guess We’re Both Lonely (alt)

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- BUY IT – SITE IT – SPACE IT – FACE IT – TWIT IT – LAST IT - 61 IT -

last offence: back it on up.

lastoffence

[dewplayer:http://www.fileden.com/files/2009/1/1/2248587/03%20Back%20It%20On%20Up.mp3]

dl: Last Offence f/ Jay-Z – Back It On Up (alt)

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Am I just schmetarded or has someone used this Jay-Z sample before? Either way, it’s slightly empowering to hear his vocals utilized for a gay hip-hop song. Hova isn’t the most infamous culprit for homophobia in hip-hop, but he definitely has a certain “no homo” air about him that emphasizes the rap game’s “Straights only!” boys club vibe. This is like saying, “Fuck you, we can come hard on a track too.” Pause.

Every time I check in with Last Offence, he seems to be getting better and better. I’m hoping that he’ll put out a song some day that will make my jaw drop. I will say in disbelief, “This is Last Offence? Holy shit, he is going to be famous yesterday.” And then I will high five everyone I know while serving cheesy mashed potatoes with a side of awesome.

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- SPACE IT – LAST IT – TWIT IT - HYPE IT -

reptar: phonetics.

reptar

[dewplayer:http://www.fileden.com/files/2009/1/1/2248587/Phonetics.mp3]

dl: Reptar – Phonetics (alt)

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Reptar is more than a fictional cartoon dinosaur from a fictional children’s television show. It’s also the name of my penis. Beyond that, it’s the name of a band from Athens, GA who describes themselves as “The Talking Heads meets a more electronic Beirut“. While I’m not really sure if I can agree with that designation, their song “Phonetics” shows immense potential. And when I say immense, I mean they could “OMG TOTES B THE NEXT MGMT“. If I did A&R for an indie label, I’d be jizzing myself so much that it’d be dripping down my ankles. My ol’ Reptar would be so worn out from the immense indie-boner experienced.

My only complaint? Their songs are too damn long. I am such an A.D.D. motherfucker that it’s rare for me to remain engaged beyond the five minute mark of a song. There are obviously exceptions, and “Phonetics” takes a place as one of them. Reptar’s other song “Context Clues” might also be one of those exceptions. Hell, all of their songs might be exceptions if they’re all as exceptional as “Phonetics”.

With that said, I’m still not entirely sure what this song is about. In my head, this is a song about hooking up with a crush you’ve admired from afar for a relatively long time. You only begin to realize the next morning that you have very little in common, resulting in a scramble between your socially awkward tendencies, neuroses and desire to impress your consummated crush. When all is said and done, the new person in your life means nothing, because you are in a fantastic band called Reptar that is destined to tour on ice-skates.

Revelation: This song may not have anything to do with romance. It might be about going to camp or having a college roommate. In fact, the latter could be more possible than lover shit.

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– SPACE IT – 61 IT -

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